I’m stressed out and sad today. My youngest daughter is having behavioral problems above and beyond normal puberty mood swings. Remember I have already raised two older successful children, so I know the drama of the teenage years up close and personal.
My daughter has never been easy. Even as a toddler she was throwing tantrums and was hard to control. She went to testing and was in a special preschool program for such behaviors. It worked and we had some pretty good years for a while with only minor incidents along the way. I was not taking it for granted, I loved it. I was finally, even though intermittently, having a relationship with her.
Fast forward to twelve. Temper tantrums have resumed …. preteen style. New to the mix is lying and being sneaky. Yelling and swearing at me.
I’m so tired. Sad, I think today. I don’t usually cry, but it comes on unexpectedly lately. I’m not talking a sobbing session like earlier days in my life, but just a few quite tears.
My son, unfortunately, falls into the category of being “unintuitive”. He is sensitive, but things have to be pointed out to him. There is nothing wrong with it as long as the female in his life doesn’t mind either.
When my friend died last week it hit me pretty hard. After visiting her and her family that day I came home and holed up in my room with some wine and my phone. I was feeling a little sorry for myself because Emily and my sister Ellen weren’t there. They are always there for me, but they weren’t physically there and I really could have used them. I told Emily on the phone that I really needed a hug.
I didn’t realize until I heard a text buzz that Tristan was charging his phone in my room. I instinctively looked over and read that it was from Emily. She wrote “go in and give mom a hug, she really needs one”.
Just then, Tristan came in and got his phone. I wondered how long it would take him to come back after reading his texts.
Ten minutes went by when Tristan knocked. He came in and sat in bed with me. He asked me to tell him what happened that day. I told him everything. He held my hand and then gave me a hug.
I hope I’ve always given them what they needed the way they just gave me what I needed.